because new jersey is the dumbest state (no other state on the east coast messes with I-95... it's a straight shot from florida to maine, except, of course, in new jersey, where they have their shitty little turnpike and therefore feel empowered to turn I-95 back on itself, abruptly switching its name to 295 and then ending it in the middle of NOwhere so that you are guaranteed to undergo the extreme aggravation that are panhandle left turns! come on new jersey, get your shit together already. nobody likes you. at least TRY to fit into the union and maybe the acute animosity you bring out in the public will be dulled to a general ignorance as in the case of your sister state, delaware) it turned night and pictures no longer said so much about the trip. too bad i can't give you a little taste of the smells from that rental car though. Hoo-boy, that would sure learn you a thing or two about this little awesome roadtrip extravaganza that is now over.

please do not attempt to acheive this form on your own. we are experienced, professional self-abusers, and we act in full awareness of the consequenses of our actions.

five days of barbeque, beer, street food, and sitting around in a car for hours on end and maybe you could look this good too!

or, welcome to our nation's capital's traffic!!!

without a picture of the highway patrol? thank goodness for the highway patrol!






pigs.

suspension made simple

goddamn drunken truck drivers!

he was tired of the hillbilly look, and since we were on our way back to new york, he decided to embrace his yankee heritage.

have truck will travel

you supply your own plastic bags

that all the other places didn't like bikers. cheap ice too.

note the drive through on the side. "hello, i'd like heart disease and a lifetime of obesity to go please"

TMed proper and good eats.

and by that i mean sauce made out of vinegar and powder. it leaked all over the place, and the consensus was by far in favor of the memphis style, which seemed to prevail in north carolina despite the long-standing b-b-q blood feud.

despite the detailed two-napkin directions given to us by a cocktail waitress in a small gold dress, we never found the beach, so we decided to give up and head for home. one last bar-b-q debauchery was in order though, so we stopped at this place by the side of the road.